68 - Chains

Genre: Puzzle
Rating: N/A
Developer: 2DEngine.com
Publisher: Meridian4
Platform: PC (Steam)
Release Year: 2008

Chains is one of those games I put off playing every time I saw it in my Steam collection. It just sounds so dull, the graphics didn't look very great, and overall I didn't know what it was. Out of boredom (and a bit of inspiration) I decided it was time to give the game that has sat in my library for 3 years a shot.

The game is fairly interesting, and full of various gameplay mechanics, despite having only twenty levels overall. Basically, the title is a match game where you must connect orbs of the same colors together. The basic amount is three, but you can often find yourself chaining many more if they're all touching. The mechanic itself isn't the creative part as there are many games like that.

What is interesting is how many gameplay modes can be created out of it. For example, there is one mode where the circles are situated on top of gates. You must manage to keep clearing circles well enough so that X amount don't fall through the gates as they open up every few seconds. Another mode gives you a small tube for the circles to fall through and asks to keep it flowing for five minutes. If you're not able to connect them fast enough they'll clog everything up. Most of these modes are a lot of fun and only a few annoyed me.

I haven't beaten the game yet and that's just because one of the modes is a fairly confusing. I'm hoping that's the only one like it because otherwise the game is much more fun than was anticipated. Those who are fans of matching puzzle games should give Chains a look especially since it's only $5.

Would I play it again? Sure.

67 - 50 Cent: Bulletproof

Genre: Action
Rating: M
Developer: Genuine Games
Publisher: VU Games
Platform: PS2 (Also: Xbox, PSP)
Release Year: 2005

50 Cent: Bulletproof is an odd game. If there were any way to describe it it would probably be the sort of thing that musical artists 50 Cent dreams about. I don't know how much he contributed to the project, but it definitely seems like a kind of game made to fulfill some wishes.

In the game you're 50 Cent, of course, and are simply living your life out in your hood until one of your homies is gunned down. Except he's not gunned down by a rival game but some sort of super soldier guys. 50 deduces that there's someone more on his tail than usual, assembles his crew, and sets off to destroy all those involved.

Gameplay is probably where 50 Cent: Bulletproof is the worst so many people have probably never even finished it. It's basically a very simple first/third person shooter but very little is thrown in to spice it up. That means you'll be awkwardly firing at hordes of racially stereotyped gangsters. The objectives, too, are a bit difficult to understand at times. You'll get them all posted to your cellphone but from there it's often hard to figure out where the trigger for them is.

If the gameplay is lacking then why would anyone other than an obsessive 50 Cent fan play? As odd as it sounds, the story is probably the best part of it. Although the first few minutes seem dull, after the catalyst of his homie getting killed, things quickly progress into stranger territory. There are some really odd characters in the cast and it was always interesting seeing what they were up to.

I wouldn't recommend the game to most people but there is something about it that kept me playing. Now I've got to get my hands on a copy of 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand and see if it improves upon the foundation of Bulletproof.


Would I play again? No. Beat it.

66 - Enchanted Arms (360)

Genre: SRPG
Rating: T
Developer: From Software
Publisher: Ubisoft
Platform: 360 (Also: PS3)
Release Date: 2006

I'm not really sure what spurred me to play Enchanted Arms but it led to a really great day of gaming. Usually I don't find myself playing games for more than an hour at a time. For one, there's other business to attend to. The much larger problem though tends to be that I just can't remain interested for that long with nay game anymore. Every once in a while something grabs hold and won't let go (like, say, Corpse Party) but otherwise even the most "addictive" games are passed over by me.

So it was definitely really strange when this RPG managed to hook me in for a great deal of hours on my first time playing it. The game isn't honestly all that great though. The graphics have definitely been surpased by now and the voice acting in particular is awful. You can switch between the English and Japanese voices and, unless you need a laugh, stick with Japanese. I just left it at default English voices because it made the otherwise same-y story have more life.

The game itself is basically a turn-based SRPG. What makes this more interesting is that you've got "golems" to create. These golems are basically like Pokemon or anything else because one big point of the game is to catch them all and train them well. They gain new abilities and all that jazz just like other members in your party do. It's rather fun.

What makes this game probably so awesome to me is that it adds in a lot of features that modern RPGs should have. For one, it allows the option to save anywhere. Why is this still not the case in every game? Just keep players from being able to save mid-battle or something and then it should be fine. Secondly, the game lets you put battles on auto and even speed up the proceedings with the push of a button. I wish more games allowed you to fast forward through the repetitive bits. These were pretty much necessary additions though as random battles happen a lot.

For all the good stuff I have to say about it, Enchanted Arms failed me at about 7 or 8 hours in. It's around this point that the game finally takes on JRPG tactics of old and requires copious amounts of grinding because all enemies have suddenly become insanely strong. I don't like grinding in any games and I wish this didn't have to be a part of the genre. So, I've put it aside for now and don't expect to touch it anytime soon. Still, for a fan of the genre it would probably be worth trying out to see what it does right.

Would I play again? No.

65 - Hitman: Blood Money (Steam)

Genre: Stealth
Rating: M
Developer: IO Interactive
Publisher: Eidos
Platform: Steam (Also: PS2, Xbox, Xbox 360)
Release Date: 2006

This is the only Hitman game I've spent serious time playing although it was not my first experience with the series. I started off with the first game, Hitman: Codename 47, but found it much too difficult to play. Although generally stealth games are pretty cool, they are often way harder than I can handle. It's one thing to understand how to be quiet and stay out of site but it's another thing to actually be able to carry it out.

So, with my normal inability to play stealth games I ended up really enjoying this game all the same. I think it's due to the fact that in Hitman: Blood Money you don't have to be stealth if you really don't want to. Obviously the game pushes you in that direction but allows most missions to be completed regardless of getting seen by people, killing civilians, or whatever else trouble you might get yourself into. I appreciate this because it means the game is really open to all kinds of play styles and techniques (including my bumbling, Rambo-esque one).

The game has a really strong sense of self. I often found myself just wandering around to listen to characters chatter on or just explore. Everyone has their own routine. It's pretty cool how nicely realized the world is, although it certainly gets very dark at times. As this is a game about a hitman, you're going to be forced to think about the ramifications of your actions - even if Agent 47 himself isn't.

I really, really like this game. Although I'm absolutely horrid at it the game accommodates itself to me and allows me to continue. The world is cool and I want to see it all. Definitely check this game out if you're in need of stealth games.

64 - Vanguard Bandits (PSN)

Genre: SRPG
Rating: T
Developer: Human Entertainment
Publisher: Working Designs/MonkeyPaw Games
Platform: PSN (Also: PS1)
Release Date: 2011 (1998 original)

I love strategy RPGs. I've never really been a huge fan of western or JRPGs but SRPGs or RTS games I tend to adore. I'm not sure what it is about them but they're definitely a great area of games for me. Despite that, I rarely go off in search of them. I stick with what I know and it all seems to serve well enough.

Vanguard Bandits came onto the PSN last week with little attention. It seems PSOne Classics only tend to get attention when they're Final Fantasy or another hugely famous RPG. There's nothing wrong with that really but not many seem to know what this game is. Either way, I'm glad I got the chance to play through it because it is a phenomenal game.

Basically you've got your typical story going on about a young man who must save his country from being taken over by an evil empire. Although it takes place in a castles and knights kind of time they happen to have lots of mechs. The mechs are of course used for fighting because that's just so much cooler than knights with swords duking it out.

The game is really deeply strategic. While it's not hard to grasp the main concepts of battle being able to play the game skillfully is tough work. While the game doesn't have sidequests or anything it does have multiple story paths to go through. The replay value is definitely there and I appreciate it. With each of the 20 main missions taking about 30 minutes or more too this is one intense game, although maybe not the best fit for quick bursts of play. I really dig the game and find it a whole lot of fun even if it's a bit dated now (only graphically speaking). I could easily see the gameplay mechanics transplanted onto a 360 or PS3 game and people would love it. 

Would I play again? Yes!

63 - Dungeon Defenders (PSN)

Genre: Tower defense
Rating: E10+
Developer: Reverb
Publisher: Trendy Entertainment
Platform: PS3 (Also: 360, PC)
Release Date: 2011

I only really became aware of the tower defense genre when flash games started to proliferate online. Back then it didn't really spark my interest though so I shied away from it all. Only recently have I gotten a taste of it at all via Orcs Must Die! which was a pretty fun game. This is my second bite of the genre and I see that perhaps it really isn't for me at all.

In Dungeon Defenders you can take up one of four classes (although you can switch at any time) and level them up as well as your traps. You set these traps and barriers to keep hordes of enemies from destroying your crystal. It's the easiest goal ever except for the fact that the rest of the game is so tactical and difficult. It dives headfirst into lots of RPG-type stuff as well by making you grind and level up your characters and their skills to proceed.

Within the first two levels you will be tasked with taking down a humongous enemy with 10 times the health of anything else you were forced to fight the rest of the level. It was when this point came that I realized this game is serious business. It also is probably best to play with a team of four. As I was soloing, I found the game to be outrageously difficult. It's hard to try and defend four seperate points all at once. Since you can't have your eyes everywhere you can simply set up your best barriers and hope for the best while you slooowly run from entryway to entryway. If I had more players in a team with me it probably would be a ton more manageable.

As is, the game just doesn't appear to be for me. It's supremely tough and doesn't appear to let up. Playing alone is far from the best idea... although it's true that you can grind on the first level until you're strong enough to take down harder monsters all by yourself. If nothing else, the game is super deep for a digitally distributed title which I'm sure some folks will quite appreciate.

Would I play again?: Nope.

62 - Pokemon Rumble Blast

Genre: Beat 'em up
Rating: E10+
Developer: Ambrella
Publisher: Nintendo
Platform: 3DS
Release Date: 2011

Pokemon Rumble Blast is the first Pokemon game on Nintendo's latest handheld. Nintendo could have waited for the next big iteration but instead they decided to go with something different. From what I've seen on game blogs, most people seem not to appreciate this game at all. It's too bad really since it's actually pretty fun.

The game plays out a lot like Gauntlet. You control one (or a team of 3) Pokemon and battle through "dungeons". It's all from a top down perspective and fighting is not complex at all. In fact, the game is really simple because there's not more to the fighting. You can use different skills and all but aside from speed of attack and range they never really change much.

There isn't all that much to the game, honestly. You battle, battle, battle, and battle some more. However, what reviewers are not seeming to mention is how addictive it is. Even though nothing really exciting or cool was going on I continually find myself returning to the game for short bursts throughout the day. I think that is the game's strength and it's a great one. Handheld games aren't necessarily meant to be long, intensive things but nice breaks from work or school. This is Pokemon Rumble Blast's strong point.

It's also a really long game. Some of the Pokemon spin-off titles (Pokemon Channel comes to mind) are super brief experiences. I've put in about 12 hours with this one so far and I'm only about halfway through. For a handheld game to offer so much playtime makes it worth the price tag right there. Not to mention that, from what I've heard, it even has a high degree of replayability due to new things opening up after beating it.

I like it. This isn't a game for everyone and especially not people tangled up in the "hardcore gamer" world. If you just want something fun and mindless though when you're on the go then give it a look.

PS: EVERY Pokemon is in this game! That's 600+, in case you haven't been keeping count over the years.

Would I play again?: Yes!

61 - GrimGrimoire (PSN)

Genre: RTS
Rating: E10+
Developer: Vanillaware
Publisher: NIS America
Platform: PSN (PS2)
Release Date: 2007

For some reason I never got around to purchasing or playing GrimGrimoire. Despite being a crazed PS2 fan from 2004 onward I skipped over a lot of gorgeous-looking games (Eternal Poison, Odin Sphere). Why? I think there wasn't enough money going around for me to pick up each and every cool game. So, it was super lucky for me that the game recently came out on PSN. I grabbed a review copy of the title and finally got to experience it. Review can be found here.

First thing that must be mentioned about any Vanillaware game are the graphics. The game looks fantastic. The 2D character portraits appear to be painted and even if they aren't it is extremely pretty. They also "breathe" and emote more interestingly than most do for other games employing the same static character technique. The in-game RTS battle stuff at first looked kind of like a gussied-up Flash game but I got over that. By the time I was halfway through I was totally immersed in strategizing and stopped noticing the slightly lower quality of the monster sprites.

There were some weird things in the game. Like, it may have just been me but there appeared to be some LGBT subtext between certain characters throughout the story. If that really is the case then I'm impressed since it's not pointed at as some odd token thing. It's just there... somewhat. Perhaps I just had my gaydar turned up too high.

Overall I'm sad I missed out on this game when it first came out. It's super fun and a pretty good challenge too. I'm mostly surprised they managed to make a RTS game that doesn't suck on a console. I'm still on the lookout for a physical copy of the game but until then my PSN one will have to do.

Would I play again?: Yes!

60 - El Shaddai: Ascension of the Metatron (PS3)

Genre: Action adventure
Rating: T for Teen
Developer: Ignition Entertainment
Publisher: Ignition Entertainment
Platform: PS3 (Also: 360)
Release Date: 2011

El Shaddai is a game I hoped I would really enjoy. The screenshots looked stunning and it just seemed to be a game forging its own path. As it turns out, the game certainly is different from everything else coming out these days. However, that doesn't make it good.

Basically I really don't like the game because the main "game" portion is devoted to fighting enemies. There isn't a very large variety between then and the fighting mechanics themselves are extremely dull. Apparently you can switch weapons to gain a tactical advantage over enemies but the game never tells you what works best against what. The game barely tells you ANYTHING. While I'm sure some will be pleased the game doesn't hold their hand I wasn't. I'm playing on "easy" so I expect things to be, well, easy!

Even when I think I figured out the best tactic it ends up not working at the next encounter. Either I'm continuously doing something wrong or there are slight variances between the 5 or so enemy types. The game is kinda cool in that if you mash buttons right when you die then you don't lose. However, sometimes it's hard to tell if you're "dying" or not so you don't know to start pressing them.

As for the story I couldn't even tell you what's going on beyond the very basest plot that was established at the start. Characters babble on and say important-sounding things but they mean nothing to me. It's such a shame the game is so incomprehensible and dull. If you're interested in the game though be sure to play the demo as it gives you a sample of the gameplay stylings.

Would I play again? Yes (to finish it).

59 - APB: Reloaded

Genre: MMO, 3rd person shooter
Rating: M
Developer: Realtime Worlds
Publisher: K2 Network
Platform: PC
Release Date: 2010

APB: Reloaded was known as APB: All Points Bulletin back when it was new. It promised a game like Grand Theft Auto where you could be the criminal or the cop. Depending on your side, you could have a gang of real life players or be on the police force with other gamers. The idea was interesting and since I've never played an online match of GTA IV before I unfortunately can't compare how similar or different they are. But at some point, APB's publishers realized there were not enough people flocking to the game. Pair that with an unusual new subscription method where you paid for hours instead of a monthly timeframe it seems people stayed away. And so APB died until it was picked up by K2 Network.

I'd always wanted to try the game before. I was invited to the initial beta of the title but my computer at the time was unable to run it. Now that the game is free and I have a nicer computer I can finally enjoy it. Funnily enough, I remember that when the game was being closed down I could still find pallets of APB games on their shelves. I guess they had to get rid of them somehow. They were $5 coasters basically but I still kind of wish I'd picked one up just for collector's sake.

Okay, back to the game again. I'm surprised at how much I enjoy it. This seems to be the theme of my recent MMO experiences. I really loved GTA: San Andreas and Saints Row and to me the game manages to capture the feelings I had for those games. It's not perfect and not quite as fun as those titles, but in some ways it is even better because you are playing with other humans. Sometimes that completely fails though as many don't know how to drive and will inadvertently squash their teammates. At the very least, working with a competent gang to do some crimes is exciting and I enjoy wasting time on it. I've yet to play the police path but you can create a couple characters on either side, thankfully.

The character creator is pretty nice. You can do a lot with it although you can't outfit your character until finally entering the Social District. Horribly, many of the clothes are pay items. Most others you will have to do a few quests for to pick up. Something really cool about the clothing is that you can also design artwork and logos for the clothes (and cars). It's very neat although it seems open to abuse if someone wants to write or draw naughty or disrespectful things.

APB: Reloaded is more difficult than the other MMOs I've mentioned before. It's very similar to a console action game so some degree of skill is required. Still, it's a fun way to pass the time if you've got nothing better to do.

PS: Here's my character. His shirt says "BAD GIRL" which is a homage to a shirt Travis wears in Killer7.

58 - Champions Online: Free for All

Genre: MMO
Rating: T
Developer: Cryptic Studios
Publisher: Atari
Platform: PC
Release Date: 2009

Champions Online came out a few years ago as a subscription MMO. I signed up straight away because it looked awesome but of course wouldn't subscribe. Superheros are something I find really cool and I did enjoy my brief stint with City of Heroes/Villains. I'd play Champions Online whenever they had free weekends which happened every once in a while. I didn't really like it though any of those times. Despite this, I decided to give it another go now that it is free.

I still don't really like it but some people probably would. It's a very simple game with a WoW-ish control interface. It has the bar of spells/attacks to cast and lots of boring old quests. Lots of hammering away at enemies and then returning to your quest-giver for a prize. It's all very dull business.

The biggest plus about the game is that it allows you to create your own superhero and in quite a lot of depth. There isn't so much depth to creating the body itself, but the costume has many, many options. I spent a great deal of time in there creating the best characters I could. The free version only has 3 or so character slots though. Interestingly, my old character is now a "gold" character. I guess it's due to me using him when the game was still subscription so I'm assuming I have extra features when using him. Haven't looked into it yet.

Anyway, the character creator is great fun. You can select what type of discipline you'd like your hero to focus on (firearms, melee, various superhero things). Unfortunately, the in-game characters don't look nearly as great as they do in the creator but that's to be expected. I don't really like the game but if you're really crazy about superheros and repetition you might find it worth your while.

PS: Here's my guy:

57 - Spiral Knights (PC)

Genre: RPG, MMO
Rating: N/A
Developer: Three Rings
Publisher: Sega
Platform: PC (Also: Mac)
Release Date: 2011

I first heard of Spiral Knights when it launched back in April. At that time, I figured it was just another MMO that wasn't going to be a big deal. It probably wasn't either until Steam picked it up for one of their first free-to-play games on the service. Now basically all my friends are playing it daily. Curious, I decided to check it out as well.

As it turns out, Spiral Knights is a lot of fun. To me it feels a lot like The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords Adventures. That probably stems from the cute art and top down perspective of the game. You also generally group up in teams of four to explore dungeon after dungeon. You can also choose to play solo if you wish, which pleases me because I've always been more than a bit wary of some online players. For single player dungeon crawls, you can even password protect your dungeon so nobody else can hop in. Fantastic!

However, since I have friends playing it I am happy to say I've had a bit of experience with the whole "online" functionality of the game. It's a pretty simple hack n' slash game with a bit of puzzling to do now and again. The goal is to go deeper and deeper to get to the center of the world (or something like that). Unfortunately, it costs energy to go down each level, so you can only play so many levels per day before running out. I've heard that becomes less of an issue when you level up more, but I'm still pretty weak.

I really like the game and if I hadn't gotten caught up in the likes of EVE Online I'd probably still be playing it a ton. Unfortunately, I just get in brief stints with Spiral Knights in between my other business. Regardless, it's a solid online game. It's very casual but very fun.

Would I play again? Yes!

56 - Minecraft (PC)

Genre: Simulation
Rating: E
Developer: Mojang AB
Publisher: Mojang AB
Platform: PC (Also: Web, Mac, Linux)
Release Date: 2009

My first experience with Minecraft came sometime in the middle of last year when the game was free for a weekend. Something had happened so that was Notch's attempt to make peace with gamers. I didn't end up doing much however as the game seemed so damn boring. After my friend bought me a copy more recently, I decided it was finally time to give it another try.

The learning curve is surprisingly tough which is why I probably didn't get into it the first time. You can do very basic things without researching, but won't get very far at all. To truly get the best experience out of the game is to learn at least the basics online because once you are armed with a weapon and axe you can start to adventure and mine like crazy.

The basic structure of the game is that you're out in some huge world with friendly and unfriendly creatures. The earth is yours to mine and farm to create whatever you will with it. Aside from that though, there's really nothing you have to do. You can mine and make tunnels underground forever. You can build a massive castle. You can make a village with friends online. You can really do anything you'd like and it's a highly creative experience because of that.

What I really love is that you can turn off enemies entirely to make it a fully "safe" experience to build and explore. When I find a game that is such a blank canvas I can't stop playing it. The last time I really got so into a game was The Sims in 2000. Both games are creative outlets for storytelling and creation (thank you friendly creator tools for The Sims). Basically, I adore the game but it is not for everyone.

Would I play again? Yes!

55 - Phantom Dust (Xbox)

Genre: Sci-fi, shooter
Rating: T
Developer: MS Studios Japan
Publisher: Majesco Games
Platform: Xbox
Release Date: 2005

Phantom Dust is one hell of a game. For some reason, it never seemed to get much traffic on the Xbox, but it should have.  It was a friend who first turned me on to the game by talking about how wild a multiplayer experience it offered. Unfortunately, I never had the chance to play it online and now can't unless I use some sort of Xbox VPN.

Anyways, the game is sort of like Fallout in a way. You're in an underground world because you and your people can no longer venture onto the surface (it's not safe!). Of course, being the main character you do venture out and when you do there's lots of fights to be had with enemies. It plays a lot like an episode of Dragonball Z, honestly, and that's pretty cool. I never really even liked the show, but being in control of a character who can fly and shoot out powers is crazy fun.

It's intense. The game is very Japanese and a strange take on the sort of post-Apocalyptic world. Things are kind of steampunk style, but then also just super futuristic. I don't know how to explain it. The art style is akin to Jojo's Bizarre Adventure which is love/hate.

I still don't understand why this game didn't become hugely popular. Available only to Xbox gamers, it really seems like a game that tons of people would have liked if they had heard of it.

Would I play again? Sure.

54 - Destroy All Humans (Xbox)

Genre: Action
Rating: T
Developer: Pandemic Studios
Publisher: THQ
Platform: Xbox (Also: PS2, mobile)
Release Date: 2005

Despite aliens being really cool there's only a few games that put you in their shoes. In fact, aside from Under the Skin, Alien Hominid, and Yars' Revenge I'm having a problem thinking of other action games where you take that role. I'm sure there's more, but that's all for now.

I wish there were more games like this. Destroy All Humans may ultimately be an exercise in repetition but it's fun. At least, until it gets annoyingly difficult. You take the role of an alien among many who have chosen to invade Earth. It has something to do with using Earth to repopulate as well as just explore and destroy. Anyway, the story isn't that big of a deal.

Gameplay-wise, you shuffle around on earth with a variety of weapons to control, zap, probe, and generally annihilate the human race. If running around on your feet or with a jetpack isn't good enough, you can take to the skies with your flying saucer. The saucer is equipped with an excellent death ray perfect for leveling buildings.

With so much power at your disposal, it is hard to lose most of the time. Characters do not have any highly intelligent attack patterns so once you get their logic down it's much easier. The high point for me is that the alien commander is voiced by Richard Horvitz (Zim) of Invader Zim fame. The game gets a little boring after long enough, but for a while it feels like a great B-movie adventure.

Would I play again? Maybe.

53 - Two Worlds (360)

Genre: RPG
Rating: M
Developer: Reality Pump
Publisher: SouthPeak Games
Platform: 360 (Also: PC)
Release Date: 2007

Two Worlds is a game I knew nothing much about. I know that it came out and was always compared to Oblivion. Because of that, everyone said it was terrible in comparison. I mostly ignored those statements because why focus on comparing two games? A game by itself may have its own merits. So, with that idea firmly planted in my mind I picked it off the shelf and started playing.

Oh my god Two Worlds is so strange. I knew something was terribly wrong the moment I saw the main menu. As is customary, I usually go into the options and check out things. On the options, it had button mappings for changing an option, leaving the menu, and whatever. However, this button mapping information obscured some of the actual options. This terrible main menu scheme wouldn't pass any inspection in bigger games, and shouldn't pass in any game. The main menu isn't important though as gamers should only spend a few seconds there before jumping into the game.

Starting it up I was greeted with really amateur text overlaying the opening video. Again, this doesn't mean anything aside from the fact the people who made this game are not pros. That's fine. Getting into character creation made me sad because there were very few options. There was no facial modifications, either in shape or general styles. In fact, the only thing you could change is hair color, style, and eye color. Oh, and the height of your warrior. At least that meant I couldn't create a horrifying face like often happens in Bioware games.

Finally taking control of my warrior I discovered the true quality and terror of the game. It appears that the developers made a brand new engine for the game. At the very least, it isn't any popular one out there. It felt like my console must have been breaking the way it ran. The camera for the game world is extremely strange and made me a little motion sick. It's awkward and something that any gamer would instantly recognize as slightly "off". The character models were okay, but everything else felt half-done. Animations were all really strange and at times laugh out loud funny.

Really though, the main reason I talked so little about the actual game was because I got killed by my first orc confrontation. Apparently it's not a forgiving game either!

Would I play again? No.

52 - Assassin's Creed II (360)

Genre: Action adventure
Rating: M
Developer: Ubisoft Montreal
Publisher: Ubisoft
Platform: 360 (Also: PC, PS3)
Release Date: 2009

When Assassin's Creed was going to come out I was pretty hyped. I picked it up day one and at that point realized it was actually a really annoying game. It was dull and repetitive and even the story was awkwardly woven. That's why when Assassin's Creed II came out that I didn't rush out to buy it. I played it a little and found it a big improvement, but nothing special overall. Because of that, I have avoided Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood like the plague.

This weekend I played it again because my partner was over and I know she really loves it. I felt it would be a nice way to spend a bit of downtime after a bit of a Banjo-Kazooie run. Somehow, playing it for the second time felt brand new. That, along with the knowledge base of my co-pilot made the game a lot more understandable.

Where I struggled the first time I was able to pass in a few tries. Where once I had a huge problem scaling buildings I was now vaulting from roof to roof like a pro. I have no idea what really changed in two years, but it was really invigorating this time around.

As for the gameplay, it's still not very deep overall (you can win most fights by mashing the same attack button). Beyond that, the game still manages to be a very entertaining package. There is more to do this time around. There's even the basics of a strategic game where you improve a city to increase funds generated. Finally, you have the fact that Ezio - or at least his outfit - is crazy attractive. You gotta love a guy with style.

There is one thing about the game I strongly dislike, and that is the story. Not overall, because the Ezio story is pretty neat. It's the story that comes from the "modern" characters like Desmond who are trying to decode Ezio's world. Why couldn't the game have purely been a historical kind of piece? The modern storyline seemed extremely tacked on and could have been ignored completely in favor of the purely renaissance-era world. How they attempt to tie the stories together at the end is just plain stupid and in fact feels like they put it there just so Brotherhood could come and finish off the story later. I've heard that the first Assassin's Creed had a similar cliffhanger ending but I could never get myself to really enjoy that game.

Would I play again? Nah. (I beat it and had about all the fun I could with it)

51 - Namco Museum (Xbox)

Genre: Compilation
Rating: E
Developer: Mass Media
Publisher: Namco
Platform: Xbox (Also: DC, GBA, GC, PS2, PSP)
Release Date: 2002

Usually I am a big fan of compilation games. Namco Museum sounds like a really promising game but unfortunately it starts you off with a very small amount of games. Technically some of the games have "upgraded" versions but does that really matter? The newer Pac-Man Arrangement version was certainly colorful but it didn't offer too much in terms of new content. It is worth noting that it kind of felt like a crude version of Pac-Man Championship Edition DX.

It also came with Pole Position I and II, Dig Dug, Galaga, and Ms. Pac-Man. There's nothing wrong with these games in the least - Dig Dug being one of my favorites ever. However, when you make a compilation game usually the first thing to do is pack it full of games. This was the time when online gaming started to come to life on consoles in America so maybe they were hoping to do some sort of DLC thing. I don't really know, but there's not many games available at all.

What is available is great though. The games are all perfect recreations and are good times. I spent a lot of time messing with Pac-Man Arrangement, which I'd never played before. I just wish that it could have had more games up for play. I've become spoiled by other compilation games on the market.

Speaking of compilation games though, at least this one has more than the recently released Dreamcast Collection. Can you really call something a "collection" when it only has 4 games?

Would I play again? Maybe.

50 - Vampire Rain (360)

Genre: Action adventure
Rating: M
Developer: Artoon
Publisher: AQ Interactive
Platform: 360
Release Date: 2007

This game is awful. You are part of some squad who investigates vampire activity. However, for whatever reason the team is horrendously ill-equipped to take care of the vampire menace. From what I experienced, you had to be stealth around them. When being spotted by a vampire, there's only a few seconds to hurry out of their site or else it's instant death.

This isn't the only game that's so strict. I can't think of what other games are so tough at the moment but there definitely are others. However, this game is just way too dorky and boring. The story is uninteresting, the characters are bland, and even the graphics aren't exciting. The gameplay feels more like a PS2 than anything else. What this game seems like is one of the Simple series in Japan (Earth Defense Force and Onechanbara are some Simple series titles).

Really, I couldn't even get past the first vampire without dying. Because it annoyed me to die so quickly in the game (a tutorial mission!), I attempted it again and again. However, I must have been overthinking it because death kept coming. Basically, if you ever see this game do yourself a favor and avoid it. The only reason to get it is if you collect crap games.

Would I play again? No.

49 - Skate (360)

Genre: Skateboarding
Rating: T
Developer: EA Black Box
Publisher: EA Games
Platform: 360 (Also: PS3, mobile)
Release Date: 2007

Skate caused a reaction in me that I haven't felt for a while. I really wanted to play it. The thing is though that I absolutely hated it. From the moment I started playing to when I finally put the control down I was cursing and gripping the controller much too tight.

Unlike the Tony Hawk Pro Skater series, this skateboard game feels a lot more realistic. In Tony Hawk games there were always some goofy things going on. The physics were strange and millions of tricks could be pulled off easily. Skate feels a lot more down to earth. Basically, Tony Hawk is like dream skateboarding and Skate is more down to earth. It isn't as if Skate isn't goofy at all either, but it tries a lot harder to be a more of a replication of the sport.

The control method is really cool. You use both analog sticks for movement. You must flick up the left analog stick in some direction to jump the skateboard up and do various tricks. The right stick controls the skater's body. You use them in sync to pull off tricks and it's not nearly as easy as it should be. In fact, the game is damn hard and the map is confusing.

Most of the stuff about the game is fine, except that the control scheme is so hard to take control of. It felt like playing Stuntman, which also requires near perfection from the player to get anywhere in the game. It is so hard. It's too hard. Somehow, I found myself playing it and failing over and over to simply get somewhere in it. I wanted to prove myself to the game. I don't think I'll pick it up anytime soon in the future, but it was one hell of an experience while it lasted.

Would I play again? Maybe.